What Not To Do When A Man Cries

What Not To Do When A Man Cries

Whoever said that a man does not cry is reading the wrong book of rules. Men cry, maybe not as often as we do but they have tears to shed too. Just because they have a different set of hormones it’s stupid to expect them to be macho all the time. Tears are a form of releasing extreme stress and if its works for you, it will work for them too. So here are a few things you absolutely must not do if you find your man crying, nor any man for that matter.


#1 – Don’t laugh


This is an absolute no-no. If you come across your man crying, do not give in to the instinct of the moment and start laughing. That is not just insulting but also very disrespectful of the other person’s grief or misfortune. The so-called called absurdity of seeing a grown man cry should not throw you off kilter. If you are the modern woman that you claim to be take it in your stride and deal with it normally.


#2 – Don’t judge 


Making snap judgements about a person just because you have some set ideas makes you a bigot. If a man breaks down it doesn’t mean that he is a weak person. Yes he is having a bad or a weak moment, but then don’t we all? Put yourself in your place and think how you would feel is someone judged you harshly because an extreme situation made you lose control. It doesn’t explain your entire personality you see, just one part of it.


#3 – Don’t embarrass him 


When you see your man crying you have to understand that he is going through a really rough time. Few men break down easily, it’s not about culture but more about genetic makeup. Don’t call his friends and families for support but try and empathize with him instead. He needs your support not theirs. So instead of making it a breaking news tread softly. Sit beside him, ask him what’s wrong and hold his hand till he quietens down.


#4 – Don’t cry


Whatever you do, don’t start crying yourself. This is his time to shine, rather rain so don’t try and steal his thunder. Nothing is sillier than a person opting for the easiest way out when the going gets tough. Besides, when you cry he is always there to console you, isn’t he? Expecting him to do the same when he is in dire need of support is just plain selfish. So suck it up and be a man, for once.


#5 – Don’t freeze up 


This is not the time to freeze up and look the other way. Instead of going into shock, try and console him out of his shock and distress. If you feel that a man in tears is an unseemly sight then you are probably not the right person for him. Don’t let your prejudices permanently damage your relationship. He needs your support, not condescension. He needs a big hug right then and there, from you.

The big men in my family are criers. My dad would cry at our good grades and bad, my brother-in-law cries at sad movies and the man in my life cries when I cook. So am used to the awesome cuteness of it.


Written by Bambi Majumdar.

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